stilettos on wood..

I go to work... and we decide to go indian for lunch.. and so we go to this little andhra place.. Im dressed in my formals.. with my shoes.. I enter and before I know it.. I'm skidding on the floor..
Thankfully, Im able to regain balance using a nearby table before falling flat on my face.. and then I was thinking.. isn't it horrible when you try to make yourself up perfect and then you blotch up on the littlest thing..and you stand there.. and just feel like burying yourself.. cos the whole impression you made.. with the clothes and everything else, just got destroyed by that.. not to mention the sheer embarrassment next to my coworkers..
I felt so silly and so ungrown up that I suddenly wondered whether we could ever live by our age.. or wed always feel a little older or younger than we are..

The week undone

you know those days that are just in the middle.. where everything is so neutral that you tend to take things one way or the other, cos the dynamic equilibrium in life never lets anything stay absolutely still?? Well.. the past few days have been an on and off of the sorts.. its not been bad.. but then not particularly good either.. and then you come out with this sticky taste on your tongue.. like somethings bothering you.. but you cant get it out either.. and when you want a lot of people around you.. but then you really don't.. and everythings so confusing cos everything seems like just what you dont want.. but then you arent bothered enough to take it away..
So, in order to resolve issues.. i took it upon myself to make dal paalak.. and straighten my hair.. and go to sleep reading my great new book... and somehow.. things started to feel better.. not that I had gotten any further with resolving anything.. but I just felt like maybe the world was static for a while.. and I hadn't gotten it all wrong..

Is that the one?

Ever experienced the feeling of short term amnesia and complete hold of memory at the same time? I've maintained an infamous reputation for the capacity to remember my clothes and shoes, irrespective of how many they might be, and how old they are. My unique capacity also includes remembering the history of every piece of clothing I own. Everytime we changed houses, or I had to pack up, we went through an eloberate ritual of where the clothes came from, and how they landed in my closet. If that wasn't enough, I'd embark into a wholly philanthropic mode, where I decide which clothes would go for charity.

Ahh... but there lies the bigger problem.. if I give something away, then I'll have to erase that top with all its memories attached to it from me.. and do I then have the strength to severe that tie?? I try hitting middle ground by trying to convince friends to wear it, so that, in my mind, that outfit still stays with me, and I have the potential to remember it ever so often.

After serious considerations, I managed to get 5 pieces of clothing, ready for the red cross, and my roomie (looking at me lovingly) going "are you sure you are ready to part with them?" I put my foot down and decided to go ahead...

Final moral of the story: I got so busy relocating, that the poor clothes landed up in the garbage...
So much for philanthropy...

A piece of candy

So the other day I heard about this experiment that was conducted on kids.. don't worry.. it did not involve electricity or any body parts.. but what the scientists did do.. was offer each child a piece of candy.. they were then told to sit in the room with the candy for an hour. If they could resist eating it.. then they would get another piece, whereas if they ate the candy, they wouldn't. A follow up after 30 years showed that all those who waited for the next piece of candy were extremely successful, while those who ate it weren't. A classic example of living in the moment vs not..
Does waiting pay off?? Does a serious cost benefit analysis help in coming up with a more ideal solution? Or should we follow pop culture and take chances for everything?

Life and things like that..

Its funny how everytime you think you have everything you need... you are made aware of the one thing you want the most.. and I don't mean those new shoes or the great new movie.. I mean things like the perfect career or the perfect guy.. Its not like being put on the crossroads.. but then.. its not like you aren't there either.. so how do you know your decision is right?? Is it that one minute of clarity that makes it right?? Or will the hours of indecision and unhappiness that follow it make it wrong?? How do you decide if what you decided will keep you happy for long?? Living for the moment might seem like the best solution.. but then I never really think that solves the problem.. there are a lot of lil things in life that will make you happy, like that unexpected phone call, or a compliment from a stranger.. but do you really want every minute of your life to be that way?? or does some level of comfort bring in a greater happiness??